Exactly how stupid do they think I am?

Wait, don’t answer that. But however stupid I really am, which on a good day is “only a little,” I’m not gullible enough to unleash this scam  into my computer.

I haven’t written about scams in a while, because they’ve all been depressingly the same old, same old. Mr. Farouk Al-Imacrook wants my help in getting millions out of some African country, Mrs. Bebe Willyoufallforthis is dying and has selected me to distribute her great wealth. That hoary old chestnut where an acquaintance gets hacked and that email sends out pleas of “Help! I’m in Djakarta and my wallet was stolen!” made the rounds again. I suppose it’s a function of using what works just often enough.

But this one is a new low in “We couldn’t deliver your package.”

BBC Latest News:

Girl dies after alleged bullying attack
Authorities are investigating whether it was an extreme case of bullying that led to the death of a 17-year-old student in Argentina, after she was attacked by two women and another girl last week.

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Fascinating. Like this would get you anything besides a blank look at the counter? It’s called “prior plausibility” and as far as getting me to click on that button? Not happening. The Post Office doesn’t work that way. (The button’s fangs have been pulled: Lord knows what sort of mayhem was waiting at http://
babirutza.biz) Not to mention the weirdness of getting BBC news from this source. The typo is theirs, and the wording betrays unfamiliarity with local conventions.

Besides, we may outsource a lot of customer service in the US, but the Post Office to a place where the return address is donotreplay@ayulistari.nl? Puhlease.

This scam has the novelty of a clickable link for trouble rather than an attachment with an exec file hidden inside, which makes it harder for the filters to catch and quarantine it.

People do receive packages all the time, so not being able to deliver one isn’t out of the question, but we know how it’s done, and it isn’t like this.